BACK To The beginnings!

With insanity in my genes and a head injury (which my mother dismisses off as nothing, since it was her fault for rocking the cradle hard enough for my head and wall to meet each other with a resounding thud!!) I steadily grew from a constantly sickly baby to a fully grown up 13 month,once in a while sick toddler!. My mother always wanted a girl child and took great pleasure in making me wear girly clothes and letting me parade around the front gate of my house. To top it, i had long tresses, saved for tonsuring in Tirupathi which kept getting delayed due to my dad's busy non-paying job as an assistant director in Devar films.The pale face, long hair and girly clothes made people wonder if i was a boy or a girl and a few of them kept asking me what i was as they were passing by..

I seem to have taken it for a while and after that got progressively pissed off at the question and proceeded to answer the boy or girl question from passerbys with a lifting of the frock i was made to wear, thereby exposing my gender beyond all doubt and quickly satisfying their curiosity!.After a while it became a game to passerbys to ask me my gender and be flashed by good old me!! (guess i had the exhibishionistic streak then too, though i would rather call it entertaining streak, if only just to save face or look good in my blog!.)

My father who returned to take me to tirupathi came to know about this and wasnt as amused as the passerbys or my aunt and gave me a hiding, with my aunt trying to protect me..(this became a norm for the rest of my growing up years!).The spanking left me unable to sit right for a few days and I learnt my first lesson in being conservative and not display my genitals for all and sundry to see!

(obviously the lesson was quickly forgotten as i grew up into a young man! :) just kidding folks!)

A few months later we shifted to chennai because my father decided to ask for a salary from his bosses and they decided to pay him since he was working as an assistant director/ animal feeder/animal trainer and also stunt double for artistes who were feeling squeamish about fighting angry roaring, murderous tigers or lions!.My father must have wanted to get into the movies real bad to go through all that with wide eyed enthusiasm. My grandfather, Mysore Seshaiah Naidu had a tryst with the movies a few years earlier where he wrote scripts for some well forgotten movies and was sent back to tend to his cow farm.So he had a suspicious view of my fathers promises to become a famous 'something' in the movies someday!

In Chennai, we lived in Theynampet somewhere of which i have no recollection of and then moved to south west boag road which was a thatched house.(it later became a tin shed roof and then became a tiled roof and then it became a building when i bought it with my hard earned money, but i will come to that later!) I recollect my early years there with a strange incident that happened to me.Since our house or tenement if you can call it that had only one bathroom and right across the house were empty fields..(this in T.Nagar where a single ground is now going for crores of rupees!) Early in the morning as soon as you look across your house, you were greeted with a wondrous sight of many many children squatting in the field , grimacing with complete concentration of trying to empty their bowels, some by themselves, some by the egging of their mothers or fathers who were standing nearby(if the child was tiny). (i heard some women and men did it in the early morning darkness before the sun came up, but i sadly never saw that sight!)One day there were guests from out of town residing in my spacious two room house and my mother told me to go to the fields when i expressed my desire to empty my bowels,since the bathroom was full and was going to be for a while since there was a queue waiting.I was trepidious at first but curiosity got the better of me and the thought of being alone with nature and a jug of water completely unattended seemed like a fantastic idea at that time and i ventured into the wide open world..(read that as 10 feet from my front gate to the fields!)

There i was blissfully squatting in the wide open fields with people passing by and an occasional car rumbling by and enjoying the new sensations of fresh air blowing around my ass while i take a shit. Suddenly i felt an unfamiliar sensation on my ass and i turned around to see a very large pig( i was tiny so it must have seemed very very large!) was eating my shit and was trying to reach the source of the shit too with its tongue!! The sensation of its tongue on my ass was what made me turn around and more over, the pig was pushing my ass with it's face to make me move over so that it can have better reach!!.I was up like a spring and was running like a bullet towards the house and into my mother's arms wailing, squealing, crying and reporting the incident. My mother found it hilarious and said there are a lot of pigs who feed on the excrement since it is open fields and and laughed about it for months on..but i didn't find it funny at all and was vary of pigs since then on and it was the first incident in my memory as a child and the house i remember growing up in!!

So,when i say humble beginnings my friends, its not even a joke, but i had my share of fun, joy laughter and love as a child, thanks to an adoring aunt who thought i was the best thing since 'baked bread' or 'the invention of the wheel' and a mother who was curious of me since she didn't understand my weirdness till a lot later in my life!

A little thanks to my dad too for not being around too much since i was terrified of him most of the time! He was a little man with a very big temper!!(probably where i get my temper from!)